Mind Chronicles

by Maryam Farhan (@alsomaryamm_)

My mind feels like a particle accelerator,

not the smooth, precise kind scientists dream of,

but the one that rattles and hums,

flinging thoughts at breakneck speed,

crashing into each other in bursts of brilliance,

or just noise.

I studied particle accelerators once, back in GCSEs.

They were elegant machines,

meant to find answers to the universe's mysteries.

Now, my mind’s version feels less like a tool for discovery

and more like chaos in motion.

Today, I sat down to read.

I told myself it’s been too long,

too many days of scrolling,

too few pages turned.

Math was the plan—

solve problems, finish a chapter.

But halfway through, coding leaned in,

its voice urgent:

“Don’t forget me. I matter.”

I followed, knowing full well

I’d abandoned my original plan.

And then—politics, uninvited, as always.

“Oye, I wonder who’s attending Trump’s inauguration these days?

Who am I to care? I’ve got my own life to manage,

right here, across the seven seas.”

The thought lingered,

then faded into a blur.

Fitness wasn’t far behind,

a whisper of guilt in the corner:

“Push-ups? Maybe a walk?

Abs would be nice this year.”

I agreed with it too—briefly.

But then I was off again,

chasing fragments of other thoughts.

What’s for dinner tomorrow?

Does Newton’s apple tree still exist?

Why do I always focus best at 2 a.m.?

And in the background, a soft plea:

Can you please quieten it down a bit?

Here I sit,

at exactly 12:41 a.m.,

writing these words instead of reading,

wondering if particle accelerators ever rest,

or if they, too, hum themselves to sleep

in a swirl of endless motion.

Maryam's mind is buzzing with ideas and chaos, much like the city she calls home, where energy and creativity collide at every corner. Just like Karachi, her thoughts are constantly in motion, shaping her work and fueling her passion to make an impact.